Results 1 to 3 of 3

Thread: Man rules

  1. #1
    littleroundman is offline Administrator
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    16,975

    Man rules

    The Man Rules

    Finally, the guys' side of the story.

    We always hear
    "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

    These are our rules!
    Please note.. these are all numbered '1 ' ON PURPOSE!


    1. Men are NOT mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl.

    If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down.
    You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday + G
    OOD WEATHER = SPORTS. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!

    1. Yes and No
    are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem
    ONLY if you want help solving it.That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago
    is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

    1. If you think you're fat,
    you probably are. Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said
    can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

    1. You can either ask us
    to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    1. Captain Cook did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors,
    like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit,
    not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
    We have NO idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it WILL be scratched. We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong
    and you say 'nothing,'We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question
    you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.


    1. Don't ask us
    what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as CARS or BREASTS

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape, round IS a shape

    Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know
    men really don't mind that?
    It's like camping.
    The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing

  2. #2
    Nancetta is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    356

    Re: Man rules

    Quote Originally Posted by littleroundman View Post
    The Man Rules

    Finally, the guys' side of the story.

    We always hear
    "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

    These are our rules!
    Please note.. these are all numbered '1 ' ON PURPOSE!


    1. Men are NOT mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl.

    If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down.
    You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday + G
    OOD WEATHER = SPORTS. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!

    1. Yes and No
    are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem
    ONLY if you want help solving it.That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago
    is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

    1. If you think you're fat,
    you probably are. Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said
    can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

    1. You can either ask us
    to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    1. Captain Cook did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors,
    like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit,
    not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
    We have NO idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it WILL be scratched. We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong
    and you say 'nothing,'We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question
    you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.


    1. Don't ask us
    what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as CARS or BREASTS

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape, round IS a shape

    Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know
    men really don't mind that?
    It's like camping.
    I have an issue with '1' of these rules...

  3. #3
    laidback's Avatar
    laidback is offline Senior Troll
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    2,935

    Re: Man rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Nancetta View Post
    I have an issue with '1' of these rules...
    I disagree. 1 is fine. I have a problem with 1...!
    It seems like in this "industry" common sense is not all that common!

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Disclaimer: Opinions expressed on this website are solely those of their respective authors.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42