Guys, I'm writing a piece tentatively called "Guide to Classifying MLM Douchebags"
I'm looking for "types" of douchebags that push MLM and other income scams. Don't need names, just actual types. So far, I have:
You can spot this type who always want to tell people that MLM is the greatest thing ever, because they were just at this event and it was the greatest thing ever, and you have to join. They are rarely armed with facts (such as MLM's growth is by adding affiliates, or MLM was never taught at Harvard Business School). They are very excited to tell you about the industry, but they know little about what they are supposed to be selling.
Subtype: The Noobvangelist
This is someone who just joined the day before and barely know their stuff, but they are so wrapped up in the fervor they want to "share" their enthusiasm, albeit in a naively blundering way.
You can spot this type who always proclaim that he made X amount of money, or drive a fancy car (BMW, Benz, etc.) doing that business. Companies often present those "show checks" (as large as a person) to such people at certain flashy recruitment events at "award ceremonies", adding to their illusion. However, they'll never proclaim how much did they SPEND travelling around pushing the stuff, or how many products did s/he really sell.
Subtype: The Camp Follower
This is someone who goes around proclaiming the greatness of a Bling-Flasher, like "Look man, that guy made 500K last month, and drives a fancy MB", much like a groupie who follows around a band.
The Loan Shark
You can spot this type who thinks s/he is owed everything from everybody. The world owes him or her success. The refuseniks (people who refused his "polite" request to explain the opportunity) owes him/her an explanation. His downlines owes him/her respect, etc. etc.
The Dollar Discriminator
You can spot this type by how s/he interacts with people. If you are not semi-interested in the opportunity, s/he is not interested in wasting time with you. Judges people by likelihood of joining his/her scheme.
You can spot this type by how they react to criticism, such as "Scheme X may be a pyramid scheme". Generally the resort to bogus explanations like "all companies are pyramid-shaped", "pyramid schemes don't have products", and so on. They think they have a ready answer to most criticism, however, they usually don't even know what laws define a pyramid scheme in their own jurisdiction.
You can spot this type by how they pitch a "primary opportunity", but will often throw in references to other "opportunities" as well, by claiming it's some sort of backup plan, "Plan B", "contingency", "multiple streams of income", and so on. Real MLMs don't allow cross-recruiting because it creates conflicts of interest.
The Eyes Wide Shutters
Even when the signs are so f***ing obvious that it's a scam, they are ardent believers that they've hitched themselves to the gravy train. In fact, such people are known to argue that law enforcement and regulatory agencies "don't know what they're talking about" when it is them who don't know what they're talking about... even AFTER their scheme had been shut down.
The Serial Jumpers
You can spot this type by how they claim to have DECADES of experience in this industry, yet never mentions what companies they have joined or how much they have achieved in sales. (They'll gladly mention a rank though, even if the rank is not sales based) yet research shows they joined a new scheme every few months, cash out their earnings after their "fandom" joined then leave for something else. Nothing is ever good enough for them.
The Resume Flashers
You can spot this type by how the claim to have lots of experience, names all the companies and ranks achieved, even wrote books, articles, speaking engagements, etc. Yet how much did they really make from the business themselves? Or is all these "training" their business now? Some are known to charge hundreds a day or thousands for a weekend of classes.